Don’t feel too sorry for us twin mums. We’re able to cut corners on one or two things every now and then. For starters, there’s economies of scale on food stage production e.g. both babies going through the same consistency requirement for slightly lumpy mush at the same time.
There’s also such a thing as the ‘twin sympathy discount’, which can perk up occasionally in paying for paediatrics or in baby stores. The sight of a double pram is a real mover and shaker too, guaranteeing the odd queue jump or a spacious table in a café. And we’re not chasing a toddler who’s found her walking feet (and her love of TV at 5am) while trying to breastfeed a newborn.
Yes, while there are times you’d rather forget as a mother of multiples – like when they run off down a busy street in opposite directions forcing you to choose your favourite – it’s tough for all mums. New mums often look at me hard, all wild-eyed with dishevelled hair while clutching a wine, and say: “I don’t understand how you did the baby stage with two of them”. The truth is sleep deprivation is the same kind of torture regardless of how many kids are causing it.
I will say though, one of the great things about twins is you’ve always got the test kid to compare to. It’s a godsend for your sanity levels when your shot nerves can mean your judgement is a little off. One baby got a poo colour that couldn’t be humanly possible? Has the other one got it too? Great! No need to text panicked photos to your mates for their input. Hold on to your dignity.
It also stops you from unnecessarily second-guessing your parenting skills. For example, one of my babies was a shit sleeper and the other was a great sleeper despite the same careful routine and environment. Therefore, it was nothing to do with our parenting and everything to do with ‘it just is what it is’. Without this perspective provided by Sleeping Beauty twin, I might have gone a bit nuts.
The handy twin test case always proved we were worried about nothing. I wish all new mums could know this as they’re feeling their way in the dark with their sanity right on the edge feeling overwhelmed with anxiety. Chances are everything is OK. Keep this in mind and try and get some sleep. (That last bit was a joke. Too soon?)